The real cause of stress, and how to fix it.
Is your life going in the direction that aligns with what you really want?
Are you attracting and connecting in loving and fulfilling relationships?
Do you believe that you can make things happen for yourself?
If you said no to any of these questions, then hear me out.
We all have goals. We also want to feel fulfilled in our lives personally, and professionally we want to get out of our comfort zones so that we can perform at our best, and live our fullest potential.
What we want is not enough. Having a goal is not enough to make it happen. What we believe is what matters.
When we are stressed, we will focus more on the negative, we will over-worry, we are more rigid, unhappy, and unwell. We squeeze out the fun and joy in what we are doing, we over-think and get stuck in our heads in the past or future. When we are stressed we disconnect, we are unkind, we are frustrated and we cannot perform at our best.
When we are having more fun, and when we are believing in ourselves, we can make things happen. We are more flexible in our minds, we are solution-focused, we connect more, and we optimise repair because we are less stressed.
It feels like a push/pull, like when you really want something, but you are too scared to go for it. An inner resistance that builds and builds, and becomes background stress that lingers. When you feel like this, it is a time when you have to ask yourself: Do you believe you can make it happen? And do you believe that deserve it?
This ‘inner conflict’ sendings a message from our brain out to our biochemistry to freeze, flight, or fight. This inner conflict can be the very source of pain in the body, disease, anxiety, depression, and inflammation. It is not just the consumption of unhealthy food and a lack of exercise that can cause stress. It is also how we are feeling about ourselves, and our belief in making things happen in our lives.
We each have individual beliefs and experiences that become programs in our lives. Our individual thinking, feelings, and beliefs contribute to our reactions, how happy and healthy we will be, and how well we can promote repair in our minds and bodies. They affect how we show up in our lives, the choices we make, and how we back ourselves when the going gets tough, when we have to navigate change, and when we feel like we want to give up.
For some of us, it can be a lack of money, feeling powerless, out of control, going through a divorce, a break-up, or a change in job that will totally blow our circuits.
Here is an example of beliefs and how they can mirror in our actions:
BELIEFS THAT CAN PROVOKE A LIFE OR DEATH STRESS RESPONSE
BELIEF BEHAVIOUR
A belief that I am not successful Will work overtime without an off button
A belief that I am not lovable You find it hard to receive love and support
A belief I am not beautiful or sexy You find it hard to put yourself out there
to date or meet people
A belief that people aren’t trustworthy You find it hard to receive help
A belief that you will be let down You have become overly self-sufficient
No matter what I have been through in my life
• recovering from illness
• Learning how to walk again
• Creating businesses
• Adapting to change
FEELING RESILIENCE WAS KEY
Resilience is the courage to dig down keep when life gets tough when the odds are against us when we want to give in. Our ability to manage stress and change. The ability to adapt and innovate, to lean into uncertainty with courage and discover what we are capable of. Our ability to manage stress in these times directly relates to how successful, healthy and happy we are.
Diving deeper, I believe resilience is also about how we show up for ourselves when we feel overwhelmed. How we anchor into our own inner thermostat. Feeling anchored and adaptable, how we can shift our mindset into an elevated view so that we know when to walk away from people or circumstances that are no longer good for us or aligned with our values.
It is how we show up for ourselves when it is time to walk towards situations and opportunities that are important for our growth. How to step into the people, we know we are ready to be, to own the life we desire and deserve to embrace
It is how we back ourselves when we are afraid. How we show up for ourselves when we feel overwhelmed. How we support ourselves through change and when life gets hard. How kind we are to ourselves when the going gets tough when we are navigating change. How to find that anchor and contentment within, feeling safe and OK amongst the chaos.
A SOLUTION
Come back to the mind. If how we think and feel is so connected to the biochemistry of our bodies and the stress response, there is a way to promote repair and growth pathways instead that can help destress us, allowing us to feel more creative, solution-focused, adaptable, and flexible. From this elevated mindset, we can see our situation with fresh eyes and from a new perspective, and ultimately find the courage to change our minds about what we are believing about ourselves, and what can be possible for us.
Happy Mind formula : E - C + B = HM
Elevate - Catch reactions + Self-belief = Happy Mind
ELEVATE YOUR MINDSET
Seeing from the penthouse or on top of a mountain we can see more, a bird’s eye perspective.
With an elevated mindset, we can access more elevated emotions of love, joy, courage, kindness, compassion, and resilience.
We can capture an elevated mindset with a morning ritual like meditation and journaling. Once mastered we can then learn how to maintain it across the day.
With an elevated mindset, we are less reactive, we can see from other people’s perspectives, we no longer need to be right all of the time, and we can find optimal solutions to setbacks and hurdles.
With a higher understanding and perspective, it is a leader’s perspective that can connect all the dots, seeing the bigger picture, making better judgments and decisions for the whole. Adopting a more innovative and creative mindset, seeing our obstacles as an opportunity to grow.
Capture an elevated mindset starting your day with meditation and journaling.
CATCH YOUR REACTIONS
When you feel stressed, stuck in your head, overthinking the past, or overanalysing the future, catch yourself here. Come back into your heart, and a more present state. Looking at a plant, animal, or into the eyes of someone you love can assist. Meditation is also another useful technique that you can try any time of the day to reset your mindset.
Being present, we can be more playful and fun, we de-stress and as a result, we switch from a stress response to one of growth and repair that optimises performance.
How we talk to ourselves and how we hold our energy when we get stressed when things don’t work out when we feel fear, anger, worry or guilt is so important. Talk to yourself as you would to your 3-year-old child. Hold your hand on your heart and let that inner dialogue and self-talk be kind, compassionate, and free of judgment and negativity. Back yourself, love yourself, and others will be inclined to join you too.
I have another useful technique called The Pineapple Effect and have done a podcast that explains how to use the word ‘pineapple’ to defrag your old habits and rewire your brain to create new ones.
Catch your reactions with meditation and journaling.
SELF BELIEF
What we believe is what matters, it is connected to your biochemistry and will determine if you are a repair and performance machine or if you are in stress response.
Align your goals with your beliefs and let your reactions show you if this is out of balance.
Have rituals that help you to identify your beliefs like journaling, or see a Kinesiologist as they are trained to help you to understand your beliefs that are also connected to the health of your body.
Our beliefs are a mirror image of the lives we are creating, so if you do not like what you see in your life, come back to the mind, how you are feeling, thinking, and what you believe about yourself, and what can be possible for you. With flexibility, you can feel good, receive more joy and become more playful in your life again.
When we believe in ourselves and the possibility of making it happen, we are creating our lives deliberately again, we can finally let go of that inner conflict and resistance that has been holding us back for a very long time. Removing this can truly help you to get to the bottom of what is actually stressing you out, and it is life-changing.
Develop resilience and confidence with a daily ritual of meditation and journaling.
Work with Amanda
If interstate or international :
Call us on 1300 188 882 or email hello@amandacampbell.com.au to find out how to book in for online coaching if you are outside of Melbourne / International.
Speaking:
Amanda presents her wellness workshops and keynotes virtually, live on zoom.
To book Amanda to speak at your event or workplace please contact:
www.amandacampbell.com.au
hello@amandacampbell.com.au
1300 188 882
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amandacampbellspeaker
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandacampbell_speaker/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/AmandaC_health
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amandacampbellau
Blog: https://www.amandacampbell.com.au/blog
Podcasts: Bend Like Bamboo
Online courses: https://bendlikebamboo.teachable.com/courses/
Bend Like Bamboo
Facebook: www.facebook.com/BendLikeBamboo
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bendlikebamboo/