The pineapple effect: how to reset from stress and negativity, into a positive mindset wired for optimism and possibility.
The pandemic hit Australia in March 2020 and periodically ended at the end of April 2020. The second wave hit on 20th June 2020, and by 26th October 2020, the second wave ended when Victoria recorded 0 new cases. We had relief over summer however, the third wave hit us in June 2021, with an even more contagious version of Covid-19, the Delta variant.
As we emerge out of lockdown next month, fingers crossed, I thought it would be a great idea to write about the power of our minds, and how we can leverage its amazing ability to adapt and rewire for the positive. So that we can move forward with a solution-focused and optimistic perspective.
We have been living in a state of survival for two years now, and when we are stressed, we are wired for survival and we are going to entertain worst-case scenarios, the negative and, we will focus on what we don’t want. In this mindset, we are not creative or solution-focused and, we are not adaptable or open to possibility.
We have had to overcome the stress of lockdowns, managing the ending of relationships, businesses, and deal with a significant change in our lives professionally and personally.
So how can we effectively shift out of a mental rut, to feeling more motivated and inspired?
How can we let go of the past stress, embrace the lessons, whilst being open for possibility and a bright future ahead?
“Flexibility builds resilience and fosters change.” Amanda Campbell
Your brain knows what to do but, can you give it the best environment to destress, relax and feel joyful again? We have the power to shift out of a survival state and into one that supports positivity, growth, and repair. This is a mindset that will help us to access an elevated perspective - a bird’s eye view. From here, we are stronger. We are resilient and we can feel our courage, together we re-connect with compassion and kindness and can lead ourselves into an amazing 2022.
With a flexible mindset, we can change our minds about expecting the worst-case scenarios. We can get out of our heads and open our hearts to trust again. Only when we believe that our circumstances can improve, can we see through those lenses, we can see more evidence that this is so, that we are surrounded by love, support, and guidance.
This is how we can create a better future moving forward.
“Lose what needs to be lost to find what needs to be found” E-Motion movie
You may have noticed that after going through multiple lockdowns, a part of you had to die for another part of you to be born. You have had to adapt and change. You have had the time to look within. You have discovered new skills and gifts that you may never knew you had unless you had gone through something like this.
Ask yourself:
Who is this new version of yourself as you emerge back into life again?
What did you learn?
What is important to you?
What is not?
How will you integrate this new you into your personal and professional life?
What values do you want to bring into this next chapter, post lockdown?
Our reactions mirror what we believe.
On my journey, I have learned that how we navigate life and change, determines our success in life. Our reactions are born from an accumulation of past events, what we have learned from other people, and our environment.
We have the power to choose our reactions. Our reactions are a mirror, that can show us how healthy our mindset is, what we are believing about ourselves, and what is possible for our lives.
The Pineapple Effect
Catch your reactions to get back to the present moment
The Pineapple Effect is a method that helps us to be more aware of our reactions. When we use this method, we can catch ourselves in the moment when we are reacting.
It is a reminder to get out of our heads when we are stuck overthinking the past or the future, so we can come back into the present moment, a more calm and creative state.
The word pineapple is a word my twin sister and I use to defrag ourselves when we want to remember to pause in the moment.
When we get lost in negativity and lose insight and kindness, we are seeing the situation from a lower perspective and are more inclined to be reactive.
Our reactions are so important, they can be an opportunity to stop. We can use them as a tool to bring awareness to a negative pattern if we can be brave enough to look at what we are ignoring. This can be the very tool that can transform our health and our lives.
Can you catch yourself when you react next, by asking yourself these questions
What am I believing?
What am I believing about myself or this situation that is causing a reaction within me?
Is this narrative or story true?
Can I change my mind about what I am believing?
Maybe you are believing that nothing is working out for you, that you are not enough, that your circumstances are not improving, and your reaction may be an outburst of anger, or you want may want to hide away from fear?
Our reactions are very special moments where we can:
- Uncover blind spots about what we are believing about ourselves and our capability.
- We can question if our reaction is just an old habit, thought, or belief.
- We can look at emotions we have suppressed such as anger, guilt, or fear. (We can only let go of what we are aware of).
- We can also choose a new reaction at any moment, that aligns with who we want to be and how we want to feel.
In our relationships
How effectively we can connect in our interpersonal relationships is a common obstacle we all deal with within our lives.
We can interact with people that have opposing beliefs and that have very different personalities.
It is important to acknowledge that how others see the world is going to be very different from the way that we see the world, and that’s ok.
We are often attracted to people who have opposite personalities to us, as opposites do attract.
In our intimate relationships, The Pineapple Effect is a great tool that can allow us to catch ourselves in the moment when we know we are merely reacting, when we are judging, and are not showing up to be the best version of ourselves that we know we can be. When we take the time to pause and catch ourselves in our reactions, we can elevate and rise above our situation, seeing it from a bird’s eye perspective. From here we can have a greater understanding of what is going on and can make better decisions as a result.
Within ourselves
The Pineapple Effect is also a great tool we can use for ourselves. Have you ever caught yourself trapped in a negative loop cycle where you can feel your thoughts spiralling, getting bigger and more frequent to the point it’s what keeps coming to the forefront of your mind every 10 mins or so?
An example of how to act using The Pineapple Effect is, say you got really drunk the night before at a work colleagues house that you don’t know that well and you wake up the following day feeling extremely anxious and embarrassed for your actions, although you don’t specifically recall what it is you said or did. Instead of continuously getting deeper within your thoughts, stop and ask yourself:
Do I really know that I offended my colleague last night?
Is it a fact that she is upset with me? If yes, what truths point to this scenario to confirm it to be true? Or is it just my negative beliefs allowing me to think this be true?
If you have done something wrong and you know you have upset someone, acknowledge it, and then let it go until you are able to have an honest and open conversation with the person to work through what had happened, instead of making stories up in your mind for the rest of the day.
At work
At work, we can also use this tool to manage stress and identify negative patterns. It can assist with how we communicate within our teams, allowing for more innovation, creativity, and connection. You can implement an environment where everyone feels safe to speak up at work, feeling heard and acknowledged. When you make your people feel this way, they feel fulfilled, they reciprocate and this healthy work culture is a win-win for all.
How to use the Pineapple Effect
1. Catch yourself in the moment with the word PINEAPPLE
2. Question your reaction and the accompanying thought, feelings, and emotions.
3. Ask yourself is this an old habit, is this story true for me anymore?
4. Choose a new reaction that aligns with what you are wanting in your life, and the positive emotions you are wanting to feel, as when you feel good you will be more resilient, flexible, and adaptable.
To catch myself in a reaction, I like using a wristband as a prop that reminds me to do it. I catch myself and I question, what am I believing about myself that has resulted in a negative reaction? Have I gone into a negative dialogue, or am I entertaining an old story because I am stressed? E.G., “Am I enough, can I trust this situation, nothing is working out for me.”
I pause so I can bring the reaction into my awareness. I replace my negative and old inner dialogue with positive words or an affirmation that aligns with what I am wanting in my life, and who I am wanting to be in this next version of myself I am creating.
Self-esteem, confidence, and communication are important motivators, it all starts in our minds, to thoughts, to feelings, and that inner chatter. We can get stuck in the monkey mind going around in circles, it feels stagnant and it is highly unproductive, and when we are stuck here, we can think there is no way out. We can go over and over negative narratives and old stories over and over, believing that this is going to keep us safe.
This typically happens when we become frightened after a big change or shock, and we can get addicted to a fight/flight/freeze state. Overthinking can also lead to headaches, sore neck, and shoulders.
The Pineapple Effect is a tool that can help us to rewire the brain, to focus on what we want, the positive, and this can also translate into our actions, and how we will show up in our lives. We can drop out of our heads and into our hearts, where we can be calmer, and more loving to ourselves and to others, we are more compassionate, and we can se our obstacles as opportunities.
Learn more about the pineapple effect on one of my podcasts called Connect with Damian and Amanda https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-pineapple-effect/id1518500944?i=1000485402793
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